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Awaken_The_Song_Inside
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Name: Laura
Country: United States
State: Florida
Metro: Melbourne
Gender: Female
Interests: I love, living, laughing, loving... writing, drawing, reading, painting, singing, dancing, acting(drama), photography. I love rainy days (and a good book to boot), wild flowers, and roses. Walks on the beach at night (barefoot), losing myself in music, brownies, and a good cup of coffee. I love friends, and long hugs. I love meeting new people, the smell of spring rain, ... And worshipping the one that calls me His own...and alberto
Expertise: Screwing up, hahaha! But really, I'm not an expert at anything...and I think I'm okay with that. Experts tend to be annoying.
Occupation: Revolutionary.
Message: message me
Website: visit my website
AIM:  lovesickbeloved
Member Since:
4/21/2005
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| I've been meaning to sit down and write a blog for God knows how long and something just keeps getting in the way.
So I'm staying up late to get this done! Here we go.
Let's discuss joy.
Not that counterfeit joy that Hollywood handlers like to package cheaply and display as top notch. Because all of that crap will let you down.
But let's talk about real joy.
Ben Patterson said that "Gratitude and Joy are the twin children of Grace." In the Greek they are even related linguistically. But what is simply a linguistic relationship in the Greek, is a precious reality in the kingdom of God. The greatest mystery of the gospel is not that terrible things happen to wonderful people, but that something wonderful has happened to terrible people. Once you discover that "while we were still sinners Christ died for us," (Romans 5:8) how can you be anything but grateful? And as gratitude echoes grace, so should joy echo gratitude.
Joy is a fruit of the Spirit. (Think: Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self Control, ol, ol!) Which means that it is for us, a spiritual discipline. The point of discipline, is to do something often, in order to do it better. The discipline of joy is the discipline of thanksgiving. We are to rejoice and give thanks in all things...in order to be joyful! Get it? To those without joy this will get confusing, like telling a crippled man to walk by simply walking. But the fact is that external behavior can change internal realities. You see, anyone not convinced by arguments or proof of something can know the truth by acting as if he already did. We obey, in order to believe, not the other way around.
Don't believe this works? Not feeling very joyful? Start thanking God for all of the things you have, that the homeless in this country do not. (Ex: Knowing that even if you can't afford to go out to eat, there's stuff for PB&J in your cabinets. Or, knowing that even if you can't buy those new clothes/DVDs/etc. that you wanted, you at least have a bed to go home to.) Or better yet, look at the homeless in this country and realize that they are still better off and more wealthy than the majority of the people in third world countries today. Do that, and then tell me you're not feeling a little more joyous than before. Joy will follow gratitude.
And that's just being grateful for the material items you have. Nevermind that the wages of sin are death and you have certainly messed up a time or two already today. Grace is pretty great, huh? It is, so rejoice!
Joy can be commanded, because real joy is based on objective reality - not subjective feeling. Christ has come. Christ has died. Christ has risen. Christ is coming again. My sins are forgiven, my hope is sure, and nothing can separate me from His love. These are fixed truths amongst our ever changing circumstances. These are the roots of the tree of Joy. God can command joy, because He has given us every reason to be joyful! To meditate on Him is to kindle joy, try it!
I could go on and on!
If I were to go on and on I would list all of the greatest joy killers and tell you to beware of them... past and present pain and disappointment, short-mindedness, fear of losing control, forgetfulness. (Oh, spiritual amnesia can be the worst of all!) Guard your heart, brothers and sisters, and practice joy through thanksgiving! Keep everything in perspective because while our circumstances are two dimensional, our hope for the future and the joy set before us should always remain in vibrant 3D! | | |
| Tomorrow I start my temporary job as a full time nanny for two precious little boys. 
(Athyn, 8 weeks. And Emery, 20 months.) I am beyond excited! I'm working part time at a place called The Pita Pit. It's like Subway, only cooler. (And with Pita bread.) I'm working on getting a photography business going here in the small town of Palm Bay. Word of mouth is my best friend, and I really need to crack down on myself if this thing is gunna work out. I am also actively involved in the church. (Though my church specifically is, www.elysiumchurch.com) More posts to come soon but this was just to tell you all how busy I have been and to give you the heads up on my return! :) | | |
| I am so sickened by the way that we define "beauty."
The other day I was at the make-up counter at Dillards. Where I witnessed a sale that made my stomach turn. The woman was beautiful, truly beautiful, and could not have been over 30. Nevertheless she spent about $50 on a tube of mascara that vibrates. And then was talked into spending another $65 on a container of the newest, and best anti-wrinkle cream, (which was certain to make her look at least 10 years younger!) Angry, I then began to look around. Another woman was trying on a pair of high heels nearby, that were clearly not comfortable. She could not take more than two or three steps without her ankles wobbling, and her knees buckling. But there was a salesman there behind her the whole way telling her how sexy they made her look, and how great her feet and calfs were in them. Of course she bought them.
My heart began to ache. It makes me so angry.
We tell girls that they're beautiful, but then we make commercials and advertisements using women who have not only been through hours upon hours of preparation, but in the end are always altered and airbrushed anyway, until they look "beautiful." Perfect. Impossible.
What we're really telling girls is, "You're beautiful if..."
You buy the latest and best anti-wrinkle cream.
You can fit into a size 3. (But preferably smaller.)
You have curly/straight hair.
You wear the most expensive high heels.
You buy designer jeans only.
You have the straightest/whitest teeth.
And the list goes on, and on, and ON!
And I hate it.
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| So this whole "50 facts about you" thing seems to be a trend this week. I've got some time, so why not?
1. Naturally, I'm not a redhead. (I'll give you moment to let that
sink in.) It's true, I dyed my hair red when I was about 12 and I never
stopped. It looks natural enough, and I like it a lot. I've had
basically every shade of red, but I don't care...as long as it's red.
2. I think black babies are cuter than white babies. I was basically
the first person to ever admit that, and got a lot of crap for it. But
now it seems to be a trend, and I don't really care what everyone else
thinks...my opinon stands.
3. I never get tired of sleeping. Ever.
4. I love Totino's pepperoni pizza. But, it has to be the diced pepperoni...I won't eat the sliced pepperoni.
5. I really hate cockroaches. Really. Like, when I realize how much
bigger I am than them, and that they have no real ability to hurt me,
it is a totally irrational fear.
6. When my sister and I were little, she used to buy candy from the
ice cream truck for 25 cents, and then she'd sell it to my brother
and me for 50 cents. She was a terrible child.
7. I like earrings, but other than that jewlery and I don't really get along.
8.
When I was in the fifth grade I broke my ankle in two places and
dislocated it while doing tricks on my Razor scooter. (And yes, unlike
my sister in swimming, I really did break it.)
9. Most medicines don't have an effect on me. (Ex: When I broke my
ankle, they had to set the dislocated part while I was still awake
because they had already given me the legal dose of anethestia, and I
wouldn't go to sleep. And when I got my wisdom teeth taken out, I woke
up half way through the procedure and they had to inject me again to
put me back to sleep. Most medicines don't work unless I take the dose
they say not to take.)
10. NyQuil works like a charm. At one point in my life I was addicted to it.
11. I like Hannah Montana. If you don't, shut the hell up, leave me and her alone.
12. My whole family always thought I would be first to get married. Hahaha!
13. I'm 18, and I don't have my driver's lisence yet. Just my
permit, and I do know how to drive. I don't think that makes me stupid
or anything, slow maybe. I don't have a car though, so it seems
pointless to me. Maybe I'm wrong.
14. I moved into my new apartment almost two months ago, and I have
yet to unpack, put together or decorate my room. In fact I still have
many things at my parents house that I have yet to transfer. I'm not
sure why I lack motivation, because I love living on my own.
15.
Sometimes I realize that I'm so good at acting, I have to double check
the things I say and do to make sure I'm being honest. Some say it's
lying or being fake, I say it's talent. Haha!
16. The texture of circus peanuts, really freaks me out!
17.
I'm only 18, but I sometimes have fears that I'll be alone for the rest
of my life. And that also means I would never be a mommy. That would
suck. I'm dramatic.
18. I'm dramatic. Some say it's bad, some say it's good. I say it's neither or both, but it makes me entertaining.
19. I want so badly to see Broadway Musicals. And to go to the Metropolitian Museum of Art. I want to visit NYC really.
20. I have a NYC Fund, made up of loose change...I'll make it there one day.
21. I really love Disney Princesses. I love Disney in general, but there's something about the princesses!
22. I sing showtunes, and Disney songs often. It brings me joy. And it brings some other people joy too. Not everyone. But some.
24. I have naturally curly hair. I used to hate it, now I love it and always will.
25.
My best friend is a guy. I don't know why but people often find that
strange, so I figured I'd put it here.We've been best friends for
approx. 5 years.
26. God gave me two fathers. One of course is
biological, and the other is not. Don't ask me how or why but I love
them both with all of my heart in two completely different ways.
27. I don't like being angry...at all.
28. I save any card given to me. Birthday, Graduation, Christmas, Valentine's Day, Etc..For sentimental purposes. I have a lot.
29. I aspire to be a photographer.
30. Sometimes I doubt that I'll ever be good enough to actually do that as a career.
31. And then I see a really awesome picture I took, and I get a big
head and think that everyone should want me to photograph them. Haha!
32. I have a very large fear of mental illnesses. I don't ever want to go crazy. I'd rather you shoot me if you knew I was going insane.
33. I have to let a telephone ring twice before I answer it. Kind of like a complex, only not because I can control it.
34. I get really aggravated with my cell phone because I can't tell when it's rung twice or not.
35.
My first memory ever is of snow through an airport window. In fact, I
could have possibly dreamt that because the clip in my head is so quick
and vague that I'm just not sure.
36. Between the ages of 6 and 9, everytime my parent's left me somewhere I said, "I love you." Because in my head I was just sure
that would be the last time I'd ever see them. I totally and truly
believed it. And for three years they always came back alive. It was a
twisted period of my life.
37. Now, I don't fear death at all.
Not for me, or anyone else. I mean, don't get me wrong it hurts to lose
people, and there are still things I'd like to do before I die. But it
doesn't bother me at all to think about it, or even prepare for it like
it does most people.
38. I hated school. I thought everyone knew
this but recently someone was shocked to find it out. So I shall tell
you all now, I hated school. I got my first C in 6th grade. My first D in 7th. And my grades never really came back up again.
39. I failed Chemistry twice. Finally, my senior year, I took it online and passed with a B. Thank you Google.
40.
I absolutley adore English. I have been referred to many times as "the
grammar nazi." Haha! I wear that title proudly and well, thank you very
much.
41. There are two words in all the English language that I just cannot stand. If you don't know them already, you won't. I refuse to say.
42.
I have a slight fear of fire. I was in a house fire, alone, when I was
13. (No it was not my fault.) And ever since then it unnerves me a
little bit.
43. I have never had a boyfriend, and I've never
been kissed. I put this one here because the older I get, the more I'm
okay with that. I see all these girls who have thrown themselves at
guys who have just left them on the curb time and time again, and I
refused to ever be like them. My first kiss will not be with some guy
I've known for a few days, and I will not be in a relationship with
anyone if there is no future intent. My husband will be the first
person I have sex with, and it will be on our wedding night. End of
story.
44. I have freckles. The first time my mother told me she
saw a freckle, I cried and scrubbed my face for a good hour - swearing
to my entire family it was only dirt and I would clean it off, and then
they'd see. Haha!
43. My sister and brother-in-law have decided
that when they have kids they are going to tell them ridiculous lies
about me, so that my neices and nephews think Aunt Laura is a crazy
lady. Or they are just going to tell their kids that everyone with red
hair loves Satan. They are terrible together. Funny. But terrible.
44.
One time I danced in the rain with my best friend. It was like a movie
scene. And then just like in the movies, I got sick. I didn't think
rain could actually make you sick. It can.
45. I was never a faithful TV show watcher...until Heroes.
46.
Two of the men I am closest to, have an obsession with Star Wars.
Slowly over the years it has infiltrated my head and heart as well.
Damn.
47. I love children. All children.
48. I only
shampoo my hair about once every two months. I condition daily. Some
people think that is gross and yet I get the most compliments on my
hair, (it looks great, smells nice, etc.) So, I don't really see the
problem.
49. I loves Jesus with all of my heart, mind, soul and
strength. Honestly, I'm not entirely sure what that looks like, but I
do it to the best of my ability.
50. Laughter is my favorite thing in the whole world. Truly. Nothing beats it. | | |
| Oh, that I would trust you like Abraham.
Jesus, help me to trust in You. Have all of me.
Tonight
in our "pre-service service" we talked about trust. And why it's such a
dirty word to so many people. Why do so many of us cringe, or sigh when
God asks us, "Do you trust Me?"
We're His children, and we desire to
trust Him. And deep in our heart of hearts we desire to be obedient and
to want the things that He wants for us. At least I know this is true
for myself. So, why then, do we still draw back at the mention of trust?
And
during the discussion there were lots of answers to that, we went
around and people shared their hearts and opinons. But as they were
sharing and as I listened to each person, I was struck so suddenly and
so strongly with a realization of what I [we] really struggle with.
Ourselves. Flesh.
When
I gave my life to God, even as a little girl, He began to make me new.
It's what He does. He takes every person that gives their life to Him
and He begins to make them over, mold their hearts, and He makes us
each into a "new creation." So yes, of course I want what He wants for
me, because I have been made new in Him and I am daily trying to align
my heart with His. Makes sense, right?
The only problem, is that I
am still of this Earth. I was born on a planet where sin is human
nature. Born into a fallen world, and living in a fallen body. My flesh
desires what I want and not what anyone else wants. Therefore the
things my heart wants (because I've been made new, and because I am not
my own) my body rejects, and my flesh fights with.
C.S. Lewis once said, "You don't have a soul. You are a soul. You have
a body." What a true statement! And when we give ourselves (our souls)
to God, every choice we make becomes a battle. We become our own worst
enemy. When I want to make a decision because I want to be obedient to
God, the very first thing to rise against me...is me!
Well, actually I wouldn't even call it me anymore. Because I've been
made new. It's the old me. The flesh. The body that I'm stuck in. For
now.
So...as Christians how do we deal with this? When the world
around us, and even our own bodies are fighting against the things our
souls so desire, what can we do?
Struggle. I've always loved the
word struggle. It's getting clearer and clearer why that is. Because
it's what's required of us always! And also because it means not giving
up. It's fighting against rather than giving into. Here's what the
Dictionary says struggle is...
"to contend with an adversary or opposing force."
"to make one's way through violent effort."
When
we're tempted by our bodies to do the things we don't really want to,
we struggle. We make our way through (God's way,) with violent effort,
we use all we can and all we know to capture ourselves, and to do it
God's way.
But there's something else. Something that goes hand in hand with struggle...
Grace.
Because we will fail. I will fail. You will fail. The person that you never thought would fail...will
fail! And when that happens, God's grace is sufficient. And though we
will each struggle with different sins, and we will each have a
different type of "thorn in our side," the one thing we can be sure of
is that we will each fall short, and that His strength will be
perfected in the areas where we are weak.
Amen?
EDIT: Read here also.
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